There are many things that one goes through during the battle with cancer. One of the hardest things women deal with is the loss of our hair. It is like losing a portion of yourself worth, the person that you are. You don’t realize how much meaning your hair has until it’s gone. When you lose your hair you almost have to redefine who you are without knowing it.
You need to almost find a new confidence in who you. Doing something like that is hard to do; it’s like starting all over again with finding out who you are, a new person without the hair. Sometimes it’s easy with wigs and hats, but there are times when that doesn’t even help because it’s not your hair.
There are a lot of ways to find out the person you are without the hair and regaining that confidence in the woman you are. One thing you can do is go to Estee Lauder or Chanel counters in department stores and get a make over. Learn how to do your make up and what would fit your skin tone and how to work with no lashes or eyebrows.
The American Cancer Society also hosts a Look Good Feel Better seminar that does something along those lines. When you know how to do your make up and working with what you have and don’t have; it makes a difference. You can take that knowledge and enhance you already beautifulness with or without hair.
Another thing that can help you find confidence may be a little hard. Sit in front of the mirror and stare at yourself. Look past the no hair and see the woman, the beauty, the personality. Cry. Grieve. It’s okay you did lose a big part of yourself so cry all you need.
After a while of staring at yourself in the mirror; you will begin to see yourself once more. I’m not saying it would take a day or two, but it will come. Forcing yourself to look at yourself is one of the best and hardest things you can do. You may not want to see what you look like, but for your own confidence and love of self you need to.
A third thing that can be done is to walk around the house with family and close friends without a wig or hat. If you cannot find the confidence to be without the wig or hat around those who love you no matter what, or yourself, it will be all the harder to find the person you truly are.
Once you are able to be around them without the wig or hat you will find yourself getting more confident and venture out without them for a walk with the dogs or to get the mail. Slowly you’ll be able to work your way up to going to the store or out to eat without the hair. You will be able to see the real you.
The one thought that held through was “I have cancer, there’s nothing I can do about except still be me.” Since a part of me was without hair, then people needed to accept that, and if they couldn’t that was their problem. Find that kind of strength in yourself.
One of the biggest and best things you can do for yourself is laugh and make jokes. Of course set limits with your friends of what and what not can be joked about, but laugh and allow them to make you laugh. If you cannot laugh through the battle with cancer it will tear you apart.
Laughing about it can ease the pain just a little, and enable you to endure the worst through laughter with friends as well as the tears. When trying on wigs, my best friend cracked jokes about one that made me “look like Mic Jager.” You need to laugh.
Losing your hair can be one of the most difficult points in having cancer, but you can find ways to find that person you once were and the confidence you once had. You don’t change except you have less hair than before. Sometimes hair defines us, but it is NOT who we are.
I was not a blonde, but a woman who happened to have blonde hair. Find who you are, love who you are, and don’t be ashamed that you are bald because you are bald, bold, and beautiful!